Christopher Sebela

writer, wronger, rearranger

I went to Times Square, that’s where all the music stores are, I just wanted to buy a trumpet to learn how to play trumpet and I went into Sam Ash or one of those places and there’s all these student trumpets for like $100. Then I started going up, ‘oh, there’s a really nice one’ and the guy started showing me, here’s like a nickel-plated beautiful trumpet, it’s got a flawed bell ‘cause it was hurt but they repaired it and it was like $1400. I didn’t have any of that kind of money, but I went to an ATM and I took out like everything I had in the bank and I bought this fucking $1400 trumpet without having any ability, I had never even blown into a trumpet.

Then I was walking thru Times Square with this fucking thing in my hands, just freaking out and feeling bad and I ducked into what they used to have then, the peep shows. Next thing I know I’m in a peep show booth, those little upright coffins, looking at a chick, a tired Latvian girl, probably, through the window of this peep show and jacking off. And it’s like a 2 foot by 2 foot room and I jerk off and I came on the trumpet case which was standing between my legs. And once I came and I looked at this cum on the trumpet case, this beautiful, brass-buckled trumpet case, I realized if I had come to this peep show first, I could have saved $1400. I wouldn’t have a fucking trumpet now, which I never really learned how to play.

That was an important thing for me to realize that.

— Louis CK on WTF

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